QUEEN BEE: "Hey, you. Hey! Hey, you! You, over there! You over there, you weren't listening! You didn't hear. You don't remember. You are Less Than, and I am your superior."
WORKER BEE: "Not in a million years."
QUEEN BEE: "You, you, you have no rights at all. None! None at all. Do you understand this? You have no rights. You are free to willfully walk out that door. Go, if you want."
WORKER BEE: "She's young. She's probably an uneducated American. Probably a valley girl."
QUEEN BEE: "But, if you're going to remain here and earn this paycheck, you are going to be my subordinate, darling! And until you learn how, you will not stop being reminded..."
WORKER BEE: "She's, like, totally standing in my way. I mean, they won't let me talk about what I know..."
QUEEN BEE: "...of what you forget!"
WORKER BEE: "...and they won't let me move forward."
QUEEN BEE: "Of what you can't remember! Of what you have not been informed yet!"
WORKER BEE: "I swear, I think they go back and change the formulas at the bottom of the Excel sheets so that when I turn in my reports, they're wrong."
QUEEN BEE: "Of what you know but cannot exercise!"
WORKER BEE: "I've had to go over it a couple of times. I've never had that error!"
QUEEN BEE: "Of what you need, but cannot have!"
WORKER BEE: "It's funny. I'm not sure why they're trying to hold me back. And I'm being told that if I hang in there, even though it's hard, I will be rewarded in the end."
QUEEN BEE: "You are subject to my will. You have a will. Your will is free to go. You may go."
WORKER BEE: "And I was supposed to get this five dollar an hour raise after 90 days. A 90 day period of training, which they say now is gonna last maybe even a year. Ha. What a dupe!"
QUEEN BEE: "However, should you decide to stay here, you will be my subordinate! You will be my slave!"
WORKER BEE: "You THINK!"
QUEEN BEE: "I WILL talk down to you!"
WORKER BEE: "Not for much longer!"
QUEEN BEE: "And you WILL talk down to me!"
WORKER BEE: "Huh, I doubt THAT."
QUEEN BEE: "And if you try to be on the same level as me, and talk to me in any way that...appears to be superior, you will be written up. Ha. Ha. Ha."
WORKER BEE: "Uh-huh? You mean that IS superior? (Scoffs) How insecure you are, girl!"
QUEEN BEE: "So, worker? Worker! Worker! Hey, you worker! You little peon worker, you!"
WORKER BEE: "She's rather annoying. HELLA annoying."
QUEEN BEE: "You're free to go if you want to. You have a will, you know."
WORKER BEE: "Uh, yah? You didn't notice?"
QUEEN BEE: "That will is going to get you into serious trouble. You know that. It has already."
WORKER BEE: "Uh, OK, that's more like it."
QUEEN BEE: "You willful little girl! You're way too willful for a girl. It's unbecoming for a girl, especially a worker bee girl, wishing for drone stardom."
WORKER BEE: "Uh, I think that's really what you guys are doing, totally. I don't wanna join you there."
QUEEN BEE: "Are you staying?"
WORKER BEE: "I don't think so. I don't think so.
QUEEN BEE: "I hate my job. I hate my job. I hate my job. I hate my job."
WORKER BEE: "I got to write a wonderful letter back to them, a nice sweet resignation letter making my demands and preferences very clear, clearly knowing they would never be able to meet them. I got my check by FedEx today. Sweet!"
The Granite Countertops are dark, whimsical, tender existential action heroes J Neo Marvin and Davis Jones, exploring the outer limits of what a duo can create.
Based on Noodle Brain Productions series aired on Channel 29 in San Francisco, backing tracks and on a 1978 workshop in SF, recreated at Noodle Brain Productions https://noodlebrain.com/nbsits.swf The Granite Countertops
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